I’ve been wanting to for over a year now, however the first one I found a year ago asked only for participants whose experience had been over a year prior. Anyways, it finally happened. Paperwork is in, and I’m crossing my fingers that I get to help out.
However even seeing the word bullying or bully is now a trigger. I could feel the anxiety in me rise as I started to read some of the pdfs they sent me. I know I can have a tendency to worry too much, and react to peoples reactions as if they are acting passive-agressively even if they aren’t. My experience was not just because of me…I was blamed for something I could prove wasn’t my fault and no one bothered to do anything to show they even believed me.
Reading over some of the sample interview questions I was reminded of some recent information I found out. My prior superior was recently promoted into a position that has no subordinates. That partially makes me feel better, except that she still got a pay raise. I know that’s how things work, it still angers me dangerously. Why promote someone who isn’t doing their job?
You know what I asked for from the whole investigation? An apology from my superior for her behavior and to be taken off of probation. That was it. Considering I had proved I was not at fault for the occurance that put me there in the first place, I didn’t understand how difficult that was to ask for. I remember HR telling me, we don’t feel we should ask her to apologize for something we can’t prove happened.
Basically I was expendable. It’s true, that position was something they could have easily filled. It still doesn’t make it right that they allowed it to happen in the first place. I think, more than anything, I just want her to admit that it happened.